Recently I lost a cornerstone in my life, "my networking coach", and my beloved grandmother of 93 years to a peaceful passing in her own home, and while surrounded by her two sons, family and loved ones. I was unable to be with her during her final days and hours due to a schedule conflict over a professional obligation. This Saturday marks the commencement of my acceptance to The George Washington University in our nation's Capitol city as a Master's Degree Candidate, or cohort as they call it at GWU. It was the end of her life that has me thinking about the rest of mine, and so I'd like to take this article as a matter of personal privilege, and share LIFE as Grandma Thea showed it to me. Perhaps after reading this, you too can celebrate LIFE!
L-ove
There is no substitute for love, especially when it comes to you unconditionally every day and every year of your life. As children we are not conscious enough to realize how important this is to the self-actualization process. As teenagers we begin to understand the wisdom and counsel, and yet we still don't fully grasp the values and morals being imparted. As adults we uncover how short life can be and yearn for those days gone by. In the simplest terms my grandmother was a gift of loving wisdom, loving support, loving kindness, and loving generosity for me, our family, and for everyone that she cared about. Grandma Thea knew how to love, and be loved, and this helped her to always celebrate LIFE.
I-ntegrity
As a survivor of The Great Depression, and World War II, this high school Hall of Fame basketball star went on to teach school in a small farm community, get married, have two boys, waitress, and later serve as the GM for the Kozlak Family at the famed Jax Cafe in Minneapolis. She invested 37 years at Jax. We of course shared several thousand conversations over our 41-year relationship, and yet one talk in her breakfast nook a few years back still resonates with me. It's about integrity. In 1962, my grandmother was a single-mom working as a waitress when she purchased the only home she'd ever own for $18,000. She borrowed the money from a family member, and promised to pay it back with interest. Rather than buy fancy things as her income grew, she repaid her loan in larger payments plus the interest, sooner than she had promised. No bank loan. No security guarantee. No problem. "I gave my word" she said, and that day I learned that "integrity is what you do when nobody else is looking." Nothing could me more true, and yet more in need today than people who give their word, and keep it.
F-ailure
Some of the best lessons in life come as a result of failure. We make decisions, take risks, change direction, refuse advice and endeavor forward only to find out that things don't always work out as we hope, or as we plan. I have experienced failure in both personal and professional instances - and I am thankful. At the time or place of occurrence, failure can feel very defeating; however, it's all a matter of perspective. A short story will illustrate my point, so immediately following high school, I had choices to make about my future. I was blessed with a great public education, athletic talent, an interest in serving my country, and some artistic ability. Would I play baseball? Would I join the Army? Would I pursue Acting? Honestly, I was swamped with choices, and short on clarity about which one to choose. After my first month of washing dishes from 6am-2pm M-F at a local nursing home (not a fun summer job, I assure you), I stopped over to Grandma Thea's to mow her lawn. I was certain dish washing was not my future! After mowing the lawn, she invited me in so we could play our favorite game of cards (cribbage) and talk over coffee in the breakfast nook. She sensed that something was on my mind, and shortly thereafter we were talking about my future. She asked many good questions, and listened intently as I shared my thoughts on each option. Rather than judge me prematurely, she shared stories of her life, and points during which she had choices to make. She shared the choices openly, and to my surprise, some of them were failures; however, this was the lesson. Grandma Thea reinforced the need for me to have faith in my own judgement and abilities. The next day I decided to join the Army, and she was in full support. I visited the local recruiter and "signed up" for 2 years to become an Airborne Ranger so that I could serve my country before I went to college. My plan was to exit the military in 2 years, and then to take advantage of the GI Bill which offered $25,000 for college with a minimal Reserve commitment. Without getting into details, I failed the last phase of the entrance process because of a misdiagnosis on the part of a Navy doctor at the MEPS (Military Entrance Processing Station.) It was that failure that changed the rest of my life, and for the better. Because I had failed to join the Army, I did not end up serving in Desert Storm/Iraq and I instead went on to graduate from a nationally recognized university, land a premier position with a Fortune 500 company, relocate to South Florida and start a successful business network that today is the fastest growing in our market, author and launch a professional development program unlike any other in the world, marry an amazing woman to share my life, and today serve as the first senior executive to hold the title of Chief Relationship Officer within a major law firm.
Failure? Yes. Thankful? Yes - and thank you Grandma Thea for sharing the perspective that helped me to create so many of my life's successes.
E-verlasting
To experience something so great in your life is to hope that it never ends. While we're in the present, tomorrow seems near, and forever is hard to imagine. Forever is way out there, somewhere, someday, and we'll all get to it or there eventually. Forever, that is. This brings me to the conclusion of my article, but certainly not the end of the story surrounding the wonderful person and life of my Grandma Thea. I have so much to say, so much to share, so much to give so I'll be talking about her, thinking about her, and remembering her every day for the rest of my life. You see - the best parts of her are within me, thanks to her unconditional gift of love, time, wisdom, knowledge, and perspective. The greatest gift I can give this world, is to honor her life by sharing her best which resides in me, with you.
I used to wonder what it meant when my favorite Pastor would say "and his everlasting love, Amen" at the conclusion of a prayer about Jesus. NOW I KNOW. My everlasting gift from Jesus himself, was my Grandma Thea to watch over my life.
I'll miss her kindness and loving way more than words can say, so for now I'll celebrate LIFE! And you should, too.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Saturday, February 28, 2009
4 Healthy Obsessions
Can Obsession Be Healthy?
YES! While the word "obsession" is rarely used in a positive way, becoming obsessed with communication, psychology, education, and relationships is what we most need to succeed in business, and in life! At STAYSUCCESSFUL, our sole focus is accelerating, continuing, and growing the success of our clients. By helping the already successful salesperson, business owner, business professional, executive, and team, we clear the path despite a challenging (and ever-changing) economy. While these times may seem extraordinary, and indeed they are, we must never lose our tireless pursuit of excellence, and these 4 obsessions will help!
Communication - a vital organ of success
Effectively conveying your message is paramount to achievement in business. Clear, concise communication is a necessary skill for profitable word-of-mouth marketing, more commonly known as business networking. Less is more. Verbal vomit, a technical term for over-speaking your welcome, is a sure way to lose the valuable attention (and time) of those who most need to know who you are, and what you do. Be specific about who you want to meet. Educate briefly on how you can help them. Differentiate your company, products, services, and acumen distinctively. Motivate your network passionately to trust you, introduce you, and refer you over the competition. How well you practice is how well you play, and how well you play is displayed in the number high quality introductions you achieve, and the number of qualified referrals you receive. Think about it!
Psychology - your mindset is the fuel for bodily action
Someone once correctly said "the mind is a terrible thing to waste", and we could not agree more! Nothing creates waste on your brain (and poor performance) more than self-imposed negativity. Starting positive is one way to ensure a successful day, week, month, and life. How do you do it? Reflect upon your best success. How did you do it? Remind yourself continuously of the steps involved in your best success, and they will become habit. Put more focus on enhancing your strengths, and just enough focus to address your weakness. Speak the language of success, hope and possibility within your client and business success stories. Also, consider who's talking favorably about you – and share it! Who’s had success with you - share it! Keep your mind in shape, think about the value you provide, and your positive energy will resonate.
Education – the continual process of learning
You can teach the old dog new tricks! OK, okay – we are not suggesting you’re a dog or that you are old; however, are you eager to learn new methods, tactics, and tools? To the point, if we humans were more like our K9 friends, we'd be so much better off. Why? Dogs are driven (and perform best) with routine; whereas humans are driven by habit. If we humans could bring more positive routine into our lives (and less bad habit), especially in the area of self-education, we'd be eager to: read more about our field, listen more to experts in our field, speak more with others about our field, and innovate more to grow our field. How are you "sharpening your saw" as Stephen Covey would say? Articles, blogs, CD's, books, podcasts, seminars, colleges & universities, and trainings are available. Become obsessed to develop the habit and routine of self-education!
Relationships - the foundation of a successful life
Connected or disconnected – which one are you? The answer lies in the level of knowledge that you purposefully gather about every relationship in your Rolodex. "I have thousands of contacts in my Outlook, ACT!, or database" is a commonly heard statement. OK - but how many relationships do you have? The advent of Google, Facebook, and Twitter have us falsely believing that we are truly connected, when in fact, we are genuinely disconnected. Disagree? Good! Try this exercise: open your database – proceed to the letter S – select the first name in your S section and answer these 5 questions: What is this person’s primary goal for 2009? What accomplishment are they most proud of from 2008? What interests does this person have beyond their work? What skills does this person have beyond business? This is called the GAINS Profile, and was introduced by Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder & Chairman of BNI. If you are like most, many of these items are not known to you. How connected you are is more about what you know about who you know, than the number of people you think you know. It is also about your ability to refer qualified opportunities and solutions to your network via meetings, phone calls, and email. Think about it! If you are not certain, or feel that you could use a refresher on your network, or networking skills, then tune in to www.getconnected10.com, and join us for International Networking Week (www.internationalnetworkingweek.com) in 2010. Plan now, save now, and invest in yourself!
I challenge you to become obsessed with communication, psychology, education and relationships. It will change your business, and your life!
YES! While the word "obsession" is rarely used in a positive way, becoming obsessed with communication, psychology, education, and relationships is what we most need to succeed in business, and in life! At STAYSUCCESSFUL, our sole focus is accelerating, continuing, and growing the success of our clients. By helping the already successful salesperson, business owner, business professional, executive, and team, we clear the path despite a challenging (and ever-changing) economy. While these times may seem extraordinary, and indeed they are, we must never lose our tireless pursuit of excellence, and these 4 obsessions will help!
Communication - a vital organ of success
Effectively conveying your message is paramount to achievement in business. Clear, concise communication is a necessary skill for profitable word-of-mouth marketing, more commonly known as business networking. Less is more. Verbal vomit, a technical term for over-speaking your welcome, is a sure way to lose the valuable attention (and time) of those who most need to know who you are, and what you do. Be specific about who you want to meet. Educate briefly on how you can help them. Differentiate your company, products, services, and acumen distinctively. Motivate your network passionately to trust you, introduce you, and refer you over the competition. How well you practice is how well you play, and how well you play is displayed in the number high quality introductions you achieve, and the number of qualified referrals you receive. Think about it!
Psychology - your mindset is the fuel for bodily action
Someone once correctly said "the mind is a terrible thing to waste", and we could not agree more! Nothing creates waste on your brain (and poor performance) more than self-imposed negativity. Starting positive is one way to ensure a successful day, week, month, and life. How do you do it? Reflect upon your best success. How did you do it? Remind yourself continuously of the steps involved in your best success, and they will become habit. Put more focus on enhancing your strengths, and just enough focus to address your weakness. Speak the language of success, hope and possibility within your client and business success stories. Also, consider who's talking favorably about you – and share it! Who’s had success with you - share it! Keep your mind in shape, think about the value you provide, and your positive energy will resonate.
Education – the continual process of learning
You can teach the old dog new tricks! OK, okay – we are not suggesting you’re a dog or that you are old; however, are you eager to learn new methods, tactics, and tools? To the point, if we humans were more like our K9 friends, we'd be so much better off. Why? Dogs are driven (and perform best) with routine; whereas humans are driven by habit. If we humans could bring more positive routine into our lives (and less bad habit), especially in the area of self-education, we'd be eager to: read more about our field, listen more to experts in our field, speak more with others about our field, and innovate more to grow our field. How are you "sharpening your saw" as Stephen Covey would say? Articles, blogs, CD's, books, podcasts, seminars, colleges & universities, and trainings are available. Become obsessed to develop the habit and routine of self-education!
Relationships - the foundation of a successful life
Connected or disconnected – which one are you? The answer lies in the level of knowledge that you purposefully gather about every relationship in your Rolodex. "I have thousands of contacts in my Outlook, ACT!, or database" is a commonly heard statement. OK - but how many relationships do you have? The advent of Google, Facebook, and Twitter have us falsely believing that we are truly connected, when in fact, we are genuinely disconnected. Disagree? Good! Try this exercise: open your database – proceed to the letter S – select the first name in your S section and answer these 5 questions: What is this person’s primary goal for 2009? What accomplishment are they most proud of from 2008? What interests does this person have beyond their work? What skills does this person have beyond business? This is called the GAINS Profile, and was introduced by Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder & Chairman of BNI. If you are like most, many of these items are not known to you. How connected you are is more about what you know about who you know, than the number of people you think you know. It is also about your ability to refer qualified opportunities and solutions to your network via meetings, phone calls, and email. Think about it! If you are not certain, or feel that you could use a refresher on your network, or networking skills, then tune in to www.getconnected10.com, and join us for International Networking Week (www.internationalnetworkingweek.com) in 2010. Plan now, save now, and invest in yourself!
I challenge you to become obsessed with communication, psychology, education and relationships. It will change your business, and your life!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
The Six FUNdamentals of netWORKing
(1) Farming vs. Hunting
Your rolodex is your most important business asset. Who you know is not as important as what you know about who you know. Categorizing your contacts and organizing your word-of-mouth (networking) plan creates the opportunity for the development of profitable relationships.
(2) Less is More
Verbal vomit is the worst thing you can do to another professional, and certainly is not a good way to start a new business relationship. Please don't assume that people you meet at events want to know everything about you, or your business. Time is of the essence, so get to the point quickly, and strategically, through a focused, targeted business message that builds attraction to you and your business.
(3) Investment AND Involvement
Business professionals commonly take the either-or approach to decision-making about marketing and/or involvement. You've made the membership investment into an organization (or several), but are you involved in the organization to a level high enough to create opportunity? Hint: sending your application & check, or simply attending a breakfast or lunch or committee meeting (once) does not mean you're involved. Maximizing your participation in business organizations of different types is the starting point to building the VCP Method, according to Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder & Chairman of BNI (http://www.bni.com/). A business and professional must be visible to become credible, which leads them to profitable with involvement, thus VCP.
(4) Perfect Practice Makes Perfect Business
Sports teams practice. Doctors practice. Attorneys practice. Do you? How well you practice your business, including how well you prepare and present, reflects upon YOU. A team that does not practice, or practice well - does not play well. Same holds true in business. If you practice your communication, practice your pitch, practice your networking, practice your sales & marketing tactics, you'll soon realize that perfect practice, makes perfect business.
(5) CARE!
Sounds simple, right? Wrong! Let's talk about customer service. If you're like most, your brain just shut off. Do we really have to tell you to care more than anyone else, care more than your competition, care more than your neighbor, care more than your colleague, and care more than your partner or company? YES - obviously we do, and if you don't believe me, reflect upon your last experience where someone, anyone, went out of their way to show you how much they care, just because.... 'nough said. Care more than anyone else, everyday, and make it your habit to give more, coach more, forgive more, and share more. See what happens and let me know. I look forward to hearing from you, IF YOU CARE ENOUGH TO SHARE!
(6) How Can I Help You?
These are simply the 5 most powerful words in business networking, and in life. No alterior motive, no hidden agenda, just straight talk and committed action. Try it! Ask your best friend, your wife, your parents, your colleagues, your customers, your prospective customers, your vendors, your suppliers, your neighbors, your worst enemy - how can I help you? Don't be alarmed if at first they don't get what you're asking, because nobody ever does with sincerity, or rarely anyway. Explain that your goal is to help them with whatever they need, and if they can't think of it right now, fine... request that they let you know when they have something, and follow-up so they know you're sincere. The results will not only pleasantly surprise you, they will change your business, and your life.
The (6) FUNdamentals of netWORKing are supposed to bring the FUN back to the WORK of being in business. I hope you'll give them a try.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
2009 - Your Best Year Yet!
Imagine ......
It's 12/31/09, the last day of the year. The Holidays have come and gone, and you find yourself reflecting upon the past year, when you enthusiastically exclaim: 2009 was my best year yet! How would you feel? AWESOME! HAPPY! ENCOURAGED! SUCCESSFUL! So what would that mean to your business, your family, and your life to make 2009 your best ever? Let's explore that possibility to ensure this becomes reality for you.
Success Is Your Choice......
It's a new year, and the coming days, weeks and months will be full of opportunities, obstacles, and choices. Where does success start? Right here, right now, today! That's right. Today (like everyday) is a choice. A choice for you personally, and professionally, to "better your previous days best", as Dick Zalak would say of FOCUS 4. Success can (and will) be your's, if you'll dare to decide! Decide to set s.m.a.r.t. goals. Decide to netWORK more effectively. Decide to ask "how can I help you" in every conversation. Decide to get involved in your community. Decide to focus on your core competency. Decide to communicate more succinctly. Decide that success will be yours!
I DARE YOU!
More than a statement, it's a famous little book written decades ago by the visionary Jonathan Danforth III (founder of the American Youth Foundation, (http://www.ayf.com/) The simple concepts changed my perspective, and my life. It was a gift from Harold Holden Sr., the founder of Holden Graphic Services where I spent my nights & weekends working my way through college. I am forever grateful to Mr. Holden for sharing it, and if you can find it, "I Dare You" will change your perspective, too. How? Within these rather unassuming pages are a treasure chest of meaningful statements, paraphrased as follows: I Dare You to Commit to Excellence. I Dare You to be Physically Stronger. I Dare You to Work Harder. I Dare You to Give More. I Dare You to Love More. I Dare You to Be Courageous. You get the idea, right?
I Dare You.... to succeed!
"Success is never-ending, and failure is never final", words of wisdom from Robert Shuler. Success begins with a well designed business (or life) plan created each year that drives to your vision, while keeping ever-constant your mission, with annual goals including objectives that are best measured daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly.
Use your imagination to envision 12/31/09, make the choice, and dare yourself to succeed!
It's 12/31/09, the last day of the year. The Holidays have come and gone, and you find yourself reflecting upon the past year, when you enthusiastically exclaim: 2009 was my best year yet! How would you feel? AWESOME! HAPPY! ENCOURAGED! SUCCESSFUL! So what would that mean to your business, your family, and your life to make 2009 your best ever? Let's explore that possibility to ensure this becomes reality for you.
Success Is Your Choice......
It's a new year, and the coming days, weeks and months will be full of opportunities, obstacles, and choices. Where does success start? Right here, right now, today! That's right. Today (like everyday) is a choice. A choice for you personally, and professionally, to "better your previous days best", as Dick Zalak would say of FOCUS 4. Success can (and will) be your's, if you'll dare to decide! Decide to set s.m.a.r.t. goals. Decide to netWORK more effectively. Decide to ask "how can I help you" in every conversation. Decide to get involved in your community. Decide to focus on your core competency. Decide to communicate more succinctly. Decide that success will be yours!
I DARE YOU!
More than a statement, it's a famous little book written decades ago by the visionary Jonathan Danforth III (founder of the American Youth Foundation, (http://www.ayf.com/) The simple concepts changed my perspective, and my life. It was a gift from Harold Holden Sr., the founder of Holden Graphic Services where I spent my nights & weekends working my way through college. I am forever grateful to Mr. Holden for sharing it, and if you can find it, "I Dare You" will change your perspective, too. How? Within these rather unassuming pages are a treasure chest of meaningful statements, paraphrased as follows: I Dare You to Commit to Excellence. I Dare You to be Physically Stronger. I Dare You to Work Harder. I Dare You to Give More. I Dare You to Love More. I Dare You to Be Courageous. You get the idea, right?
I Dare You.... to succeed!
"Success is never-ending, and failure is never final", words of wisdom from Robert Shuler. Success begins with a well designed business (or life) plan created each year that drives to your vision, while keeping ever-constant your mission, with annual goals including objectives that are best measured daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly.
Use your imagination to envision 12/31/09, make the choice, and dare yourself to succeed!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
